more animals
If you want to see more family friendly, funny cat pictures, go see my blog "Good Kitty!"
The pictures above didn't make it into my Halloween post on Good Kitty!, so I hope you like them.
Friday, October 31, 2008
Happy Halloween!
more animals
If you want to see more family friendly, funny cat pictures, go see my blog "Good Kitty!"
The pictures above didn't make it into my Halloween post on Good Kitty!, so I hope you like them.
Monday, October 27, 2008
I'm a Hippie
Today's Tally:
Laundry: 1+1+1+1+1 and maybe +1 more. So many things happen during the day that I forget to remember.
I need to stop using words like "finally". I "finally" ate breakfast; I "finally" got it done; I "finally" got around to blogging, etc, etc. The use of the word "finally" is judgemental and harsh. Remember, I'm working on being nice to myself. So, instead of saying, "I finally ate breakfast at about 11:15 this morning" (even though I've been up since 6:30), mearly stating that I ate breakfast is enough. No judgement, only joy that I am nourishing my body. No condemning myself for the 5 hour wait. Just enjoying my small and simple shrimp and green pea salad (it was good). Just saying that I ate breakfast and being happy and relaxed about it. Being happy that I could take time out of my busy schedule to enjoy this moment of sustenance.
My husband (who happened to be reading over my shoulder at the time) suggested that instead of "finally", I substitute it for words such as: peacefully, triumphantly, happily. Pretty much any positive "--ly" word will do. Try it! It changes your entire outlook!
My two oldest children are home-schooled through a virtual school and today was the bi-weekly online meeting with their "teacher". One of my recent discoveries about myself is that I am a Hippie in disguise. When they say, "Peace, man!", I am all over it. Even if I have to rip out all your vocal cords, I will have peace. Peace at all costs. I will have my Ohm. Do "militant" and "peace" go together? The armed forces probably think so, but that's an entirely different discussion. Anyway, about the conference. Because I have allowed my husband to enable me, we have a very lenient policy on discipline (discipline? What's that?). The teacher was asking why my oldest hasn't been doing the work, to which my child promptly replies, "Because I don't like doing schoolwork." As I am shaking my head at the ignorance of my child's brutal honesty, I start to hear what I expect to hear from the teacher. "Well, you may not like it but that's what you're supposed to be doing at this time in your life. If it wasn't with us, then it would have to be at a brick-and-mortar school. Now, I know we've talked about this before (speaking to me) and I guess we just have different views about education. I think that it's very important and my children don't have a choice in the matter. As long as they're under my roof, they'll do as I say, until they're out on their own. In my opinion, we, as adults, being older and having more life experience, know better than a child the consequences that their decisions will have later in life." And on, and on, and on. I must interject that I am a Gemini and, as such, have a split personality by nature. So while half of me is chafing from the scolding from the teacher and yelling into the other room, "Yeah! Are you listening!?", the other half of me is thinking, "Yeah, but what about peace and letting people be who they are and learning the things that will make them happy?" I know the latter half of me is deceiving myself. The real reason is simply that I don't want to fight!! I don't like it, I don't have the strength for it, it's exhausting, it's humiliating, it's demoralizing, it's loud, and (in the short term) your children hate you and throw even bigger, huge, giant, stinky fits! I don't consider myself a coward. While trying not to take the teachers comments as a personal attack, I thought, "How nice that you have so much backbone." This is another thing that I am working on. How to get the children to do what they're supposed to without giving in to my "Peace at all costs" attitude. Sometimes the cost is just too high and a temporary khaos needs to reign in order to have peace eternal.
My soapbox and I will have much more to say later.
Accomplishments of the Day:
Laundry
Blogging
Making dinner
Repairing an apron
Helping my Mom sew
Called our landlord about the water heater
Got the kids up and to school on time
Bathed a kid while having to boil water for the heat because our water heater is not staying lit
Washed my hair
Cleaned the table off after dinner
Did I mention doing laundry? (Our dryer is still out)
That's all that comes to mind for now.
I shall wish you good evening and pleasant dreams. I've been dreaming about tsunamis lately. I'll tell you what it means later. It makes sense but now I'm curious...what could it be?
Laundry: 1+1+1+1+1 and maybe +1 more. So many things happen during the day that I forget to remember.
I need to stop using words like "finally". I "finally" ate breakfast; I "finally" got it done; I "finally" got around to blogging, etc, etc. The use of the word "finally" is judgemental and harsh. Remember, I'm working on being nice to myself. So, instead of saying, "I finally ate breakfast at about 11:15 this morning" (even though I've been up since 6:30), mearly stating that I ate breakfast is enough. No judgement, only joy that I am nourishing my body. No condemning myself for the 5 hour wait. Just enjoying my small and simple shrimp and green pea salad (it was good). Just saying that I ate breakfast and being happy and relaxed about it. Being happy that I could take time out of my busy schedule to enjoy this moment of sustenance.
My husband (who happened to be reading over my shoulder at the time) suggested that instead of "finally", I substitute it for words such as: peacefully, triumphantly, happily. Pretty much any positive "--ly" word will do. Try it! It changes your entire outlook!
My two oldest children are home-schooled through a virtual school and today was the bi-weekly online meeting with their "teacher". One of my recent discoveries about myself is that I am a Hippie in disguise. When they say, "Peace, man!", I am all over it. Even if I have to rip out all your vocal cords, I will have peace. Peace at all costs. I will have my Ohm. Do "militant" and "peace" go together? The armed forces probably think so, but that's an entirely different discussion. Anyway, about the conference. Because I have allowed my husband to enable me, we have a very lenient policy on discipline (discipline? What's that?). The teacher was asking why my oldest hasn't been doing the work, to which my child promptly replies, "Because I don't like doing schoolwork." As I am shaking my head at the ignorance of my child's brutal honesty, I start to hear what I expect to hear from the teacher. "Well, you may not like it but that's what you're supposed to be doing at this time in your life. If it wasn't with us, then it would have to be at a brick-and-mortar school. Now, I know we've talked about this before (speaking to me) and I guess we just have different views about education. I think that it's very important and my children don't have a choice in the matter. As long as they're under my roof, they'll do as I say, until they're out on their own. In my opinion, we, as adults, being older and having more life experience, know better than a child the consequences that their decisions will have later in life." And on, and on, and on. I must interject that I am a Gemini and, as such, have a split personality by nature. So while half of me is chafing from the scolding from the teacher and yelling into the other room, "Yeah! Are you listening!?", the other half of me is thinking, "Yeah, but what about peace and letting people be who they are and learning the things that will make them happy?" I know the latter half of me is deceiving myself. The real reason is simply that I don't want to fight!! I don't like it, I don't have the strength for it, it's exhausting, it's humiliating, it's demoralizing, it's loud, and (in the short term) your children hate you and throw even bigger, huge, giant, stinky fits! I don't consider myself a coward. While trying not to take the teachers comments as a personal attack, I thought, "How nice that you have so much backbone." This is another thing that I am working on. How to get the children to do what they're supposed to without giving in to my "Peace at all costs" attitude. Sometimes the cost is just too high and a temporary khaos needs to reign in order to have peace eternal.
My soapbox and I will have much more to say later.
Accomplishments of the Day:
Laundry
Blogging
Making dinner
Repairing an apron
Helping my Mom sew
Called our landlord about the water heater
Got the kids up and to school on time
Bathed a kid while having to boil water for the heat because our water heater is not staying lit
Washed my hair
Cleaned the table off after dinner
Did I mention doing laundry? (Our dryer is still out)
That's all that comes to mind for now.
I shall wish you good evening and pleasant dreams. I've been dreaming about tsunamis lately. I'll tell you what it means later. It makes sense but now I'm curious...what could it be?
Friday, October 24, 2008
Blah
I'm feeling kinda down today. I'm out of town and my son decides to have a fit at school. My husband just went to work and couldn't get him, so his older sister had to go and stay with him at school until someone could go and get them. I'm trying to help my mom who is recovering from kidney failure and there's lots of things I want to do, but I don't have the time that I want. She really is okay and doesn't need anyone with her full time. I would just feel better knowing that someone was with her for just a few weeks. I'd like it to be me, but I'll have to settle for my two oldest children for now because my son is having issues. So, my perfectionism poison is popping up again and making me feel like crap because everything is so unsettled right now. So, this is when I need to be happy about the things I accomplished today.
Today I: (in no particular order) Made dinner--new recipe; it was good.
Measured the fridge in the storage unit to see if it would fit in mom's house; woke up; put my bed away; got dressed; put more toilet paper in the bathroom; helped cut out a shirt and skirt; reminded my mom to drink water; found out info about my husbands storage unit; purposely got lost to see if I could find my way back; made several calls between home, school, my husband and friends; started working on a meal plan; and stapled a backing on a fabric bulletin board and put nails in it to hang it up.
Of course, the poison wants me to tell you all the things that didn't happen today, but that would defeat the purpose of this blog/life exercise. I will suffice it to say,
I DID GOOD!!
There were difficult times today but it turned out alright. Everythings okay! Really...(twitch, twitch)!
All kidding aside, there were things on my to do list that got done and that is worthy of my praising myself.
Thank you, Me, for doing such a good job today. I look forward to seeing you again tomorrow.
Today I: (in no particular order) Made dinner--new recipe; it was good.
Measured the fridge in the storage unit to see if it would fit in mom's house; woke up; put my bed away; got dressed; put more toilet paper in the bathroom; helped cut out a shirt and skirt; reminded my mom to drink water; found out info about my husbands storage unit; purposely got lost to see if I could find my way back; made several calls between home, school, my husband and friends; started working on a meal plan; and stapled a backing on a fabric bulletin board and put nails in it to hang it up.
Of course, the poison wants me to tell you all the things that didn't happen today, but that would defeat the purpose of this blog/life exercise. I will suffice it to say,
I DID GOOD!!
There were difficult times today but it turned out alright. Everythings okay! Really...(twitch, twitch)!
All kidding aside, there were things on my to do list that got done and that is worthy of my praising myself.
Thank you, Me, for doing such a good job today. I look forward to seeing you again tomorrow.
Wednesday, October 22, 2008
On Being Nice to Myself
The main reason I started this blog was to remind myself that everything counts. Even though something may not get "done", whatever work I did counts and is good and valid and worthwhile.
I have this habit, you see, of having VERY productive days and going to bed feeling depressed and defeated because it didn't get DONE!! I could do 3 loads of dishes (by hand; we don't have a dishwasher) and 7 loads of laundry (that I have to hang on the clothesline because our dryer is broken), run errands, help the kids with their homework, fix dinner, and on and on and on, and STILL think that the whole day was wasted because there's still dishes to do. Or laundry. Or errands. Or making beds. Or cleaning the bathroom (which hasn't seen a mop in months). And on, and on, and on.
Therefore! The purpose of this blog is to catalog all the things I did today from getting my husband to work on time, to getting the kids to bed on time, and all the stuff in between. All day, every day. Theoretically. Because I hate turning on the massive time suck that is the computer. But, I'm working on that too. That's my motto: "I'm working on it".
I suffer from Perfectionism Poison. It's a nasty, vile poison that seeps into your brain and whispers to you that you're no good and worthless because you didn't get it "done". Sometimes, when it's feeling especially fiesty, it will shout, "YOU SUCK!!". Fortunately, there is an antidote. All you have to say is, "Nevertheless, I forgive myself and will continue to move forward, complimenting myself for what I have done and appreciating myself for the person that I am. I have unique strenghts and talents that I am using to help my family, and myself, to grow and to become more like the people that we want to be, not what other people think we should be." Say it whether or not you believe it! Accepting yourself is the hardest thing, ever. Because if you can't truly love and accept yourself then you can't truly love and accept others.
I've been challenged to truly fall in love with myself. To see the wonderful person that I am and all of my good qualities. To look at myself and think, "Gee, I'd really like to be her friend!", and mean it. To know that I'm doing the best I can and that it's wonderful. To not listen to the poison say that I'll do better tomorrow, because what I did today was great and worthy of praise and reward. To make peace with myself and stop fighting the battle within. To play nice. If that's what it takes to progress, then so be it. I am ready to love myself so that I may love humanity.
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